Monday, December 7, 2009

A Heart Problem

My cousin that is my same age recently had her fourth open heart surgery. She is recovering so well from a major surgery. She went in and the surgeon fixed her heart that day. I think this surgery should keep her heart healthy for another 10 years.

As I was driving home from my second trip to the school this morning (both girls forgot stuff at home) in our single digit temperature all I could think about was my own heart.

The holiday season is quickly approaching and I want more than anything to make it wonderful for my kids. I have a To-Do list that is longer than I want to admit and I am trying so hard not to be overwhelmed by it all.

I told a friend last week that I am not willing to let my kids suffer through the holiday season because I have overcommitted myself to other people. However, then I start to feel guilty because we are supposed to be servants and I feel like I am being selfish with my time.

I walked back into my house and I wanted to burst into tears, my heart felt like it was breaking. There is stuff everywhere that is not where it belongs. The laundry baskets are overflowing, some with clean clothes and some with dirty clothes. I am turning in circles trying to decide where I should start.

It would be really easy right now to call my girlfriend and ask her to go have coffee and run away from my responsibilities. But when I walked back into my house, the mess would still be here and my to-do list would be just as long.

The amazing thing is that I don't have to go through a major surgery to heal my heart. All I have to do is stop long enough to pray. I believe in the One Mighty Surgeon that will heal my heart if I just stop long enough to let Him. I can receive instant healing if I want it.

I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13

I am taking a deep breath right now. I am putting the computer away. I am going to spend a little time with my Healer. Then, I am going to dig in and try to mark a few things off of my list.

6 comments:

Unknown said...

You have no idea how spot on you were with this...........in my own life! Thanks for this reminder that we need to take it to God. He makes everything alright. :) Hugs!!

kellyjae said...

We all have those times when life just overwhelms us ... it's so wonderful that you are taking this to the Lord. He will bring you through it. (I know from experience!) There may be some things that you think your kids need you to do in order to have a wonderful Christmas that they really wouldn't miss... maybe your hubby could help you with thinking of a few things that would be important things to do and you could forget a few of those other less important things? Just an idea. I know that sometimes I build up so many expectations for that way I think things should be and really many of those things don't matter to anyone but myself. Love you!!

Hugs and prayers,
Kelly

McCormick's said...

It's always refreshing to read your posts - hang in there!

Corinne Cunningham said...

I know what you mean... there's such a fine line between overcommitment, and not being there enough (if that makes sense...)

Sandy said...

This post, and your Tuesdays Unwrapped, and all of your posts are really great! Thank you for sharing from your heart.

jenn said...

wonderful post! everything seems so overwhelming sometimes and I try to remember things could be so much worse--but, HE will always be there for us, won't he!